The Reasons

Chasing what has been deemed
To be nothing more than
Dreams, illusions, magic,
To insanity, I lost
Time used up
Searching for a love
Which never existed
Falsified belief
Story of ever after
Excused culpable behavior
Never in occurrence
Followed ambiguous directions
Unbestowed cryptic messages
In a fearsome life lived
By paranoia fueled threats
Losing grip on basis
Based on importance
Neglecting other duties
I needed to tend
To darkness in allowance
In devastation to devour
Watched the untimely death
To the sovereign state
Of being to non-existence
Losing pride, drive, perseverance
In areas necessary to progress.

Out of the things I’ve lost
In this whorling vortex
Of remorse and regret
From the whence
The catalyst did spark
Losing you
Was the greatest cost.

But
Even as I write this
I still think of

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